The dangers of being out at work

I've never been very worried about being out at work. For several years, "work" for me consisted of graduate school and then teaching, and I saw absolutely no reason to hide the lifestyle from a bunch of sociologists, especially since I had an ambition at one time to do sociology about it. I shared tidbits with my students, but only when teaching sexualities, in which case it was relevant.

At other jobs, I've kept the lifestyle under wraps for the most part. Not out of any fear of discrimination, but because I thought my co-workers would tease me and make stupid jokes. I just didn't want to hear the same old tired lines about being "tied up" instead of, say, busy.

But my current boss and I hit it off so well, I felt totally comfortable telling her. She's never been down on me about it, in fact she usually seems to think that it's really cool. It has helped to earn me the unofficial job title of "Devil Woman". She has her boundaries as far as what she wants to hear, and I've learned that partly by trial and error. But I don't feel like I'm hiding anything.

The problem only made itself apparent today, when she gave me a task to complete and I said, "yes, ma'am." I don't always say that. Sometimes I roll my eyes and sigh loudly. Sometimes I lean back in my chair and say, "noooooo I don't wannnaaaaaaaaa." Usually I say, "Ok, I'll do that in a minute, when I'm done with the three things I'm working on right now". But when she's completely stressed out, like she was today, I say, "yes, ma'am," because I don't want to make her even more pissed off.

Problem is, when I say "yes, ma'am" she seems to pick up on the fact that it's not really a neutral thing for me. She gave me a weird look. I said, "what?". I offered to say "Yes, Ms. Lastname" instead, and she was having none of it.

"It just comes out sounding dirty when I say it, doesn't it?"

"Yes, Devil Woman, it kind of does."

D'oh. An attempt at professional behavior thwarted by my kinky nature.